Friday, December 19, 2014

To go back

We can't undo the things we did, we can't unlearn the lessons we've lived, but if I could… Oh, what I would give!

Our lives just kept drifting farther apart like a rift ripping to the depths of my heart I tried so hard to go back to the start

But I can't reach you, you're no longer here and all the voices have become so unclear raging and drowning me in abject fear

Where are you now, my sun, my light my majestic white horse riding heroic knight, come to save me, or maybe not quite...

Thursday, October 2, 2014

Solar Flare

As I gaze into your eyes 
The warmth of your rays pierce through my veil of darkness
Illuminate my soul and peace finds its way into my heart
Your ethereal glow flows through and fuels my lifeline
I am nothing without your light
You find me wherever I am
You release me from my reverie
You envelope me in safety
I am nothing without your light

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Obsession

If there was a way to make it through the day without thinking about you I'd be amazed
Because your face your mouth you eyes your smile the expression you make down to your very smell dominates every waking moment of my every single day
You hijacked my mind and I can think if nothing else
Im gloriously obsessed with you
And I can't seem to help myself
Only you can save me now

Friday, August 1, 2014

Everything I want to say

"I didn't know how broken I was until I felt what it was like to be whole. and now that you're gone, it just hurts..."

"Sometimes when I'm sad, I think I you and it makes me smile... Until I remember why you are not here and I makes me sad once again."

"The moment I met you I knew you were someone I wanted in my life. I'm hopelessly addicted to the way you make me feel about myself"

"I could die a thousand deaths and I would still search you out lifetime after lifetime."

"The warmth that fills the cracks in my soul is only when I'm in your presence."

"Because you are the light in my universe; don't take away my sun. I need you to shine."

"You saw that part of me I had forgotten existed. You gave me the strength to bring her back."

Friday, July 18, 2014

Goodbye

I wrote this a few days ago. It doesn't feel quite finished but I can't seem to complete it so here it is:

Goodbye to my anger
Goodbye to my hurt
Goodbye to all my urge to assert
So long desperation
I've had it with you
So long to the want of all that you do
I'm closing this chapter
Your story is whack
I've had it; the weight of the world's on my back
There's been no resolution
Despite all the years
We've stumbled through bruises
Through blood, sweat, and tears
Enough is enough
I've thrown in the towel
I can't take anymore of your dangerous scowl
So today is the day
I lay it all to rest
Blame if you must but I did my best




Tuesday, July 15, 2014

The Descent of Hope

Embers fades as the growing light of dawn casts a shadow on the hopes that I've held onto
Stark realizations, stabbing dagger through the heart of whispers of promises of tomorrow which will never come
The voice of reason, a soothing deep timbre which lulls me to inaction
"Stop!" She says, "accept what has been and what will never be" as a single glistening tear collides with my entire universe
Desperation: Is it a gift or a curse?
All I know is that you are not here and cannot answer this question which burns so deeply in my soul.
What could we have been if only we were given the time to explore...? How high could I have flown had my wings not been clipped? How far can I run would I have not been bound by this obligation?
Some things we will never know.
Time may heal but the scars will always show.

Monday, July 14, 2014

I Cry

I cry for the day I cry for the night
For broken wings which can't take flight
I cry for the lack of end in sight
I cry out in pain with all my might
But for you I smile.

I cry for the bees I cry for the birds
I cry for bitter spoken angry words
I cry for music that is left unheard
But for you I smile.

I cry for all the wars still waging
I cry from the youth who are disengaging
I cry for all above ground raging
But for you I smile.

I ache in my soul, my heavy heart frowns
I cry when the whole world is turned upside down
I cry in my loneliness without a sound
But for you I smile.

All my words still left unspoken
The want inside me has awoken
Empty shell inside is broken
But for you I smile.

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Loss

When you lose something important but you don't know its importance, it doesn't bother you. When you lose something and you know the exact magnitude of the loss, it is pure torture. Ignorance is bliss. I am in torture. But I would choose torture over forgetting to try to get over you because the imprints you have left on me, I'll cherish forever.

Thursday, June 26, 2014

I can't stop thinking about that time when you said that thing about the place and all the stuff that was gonna happen. I'd like that very much right about now. 

I'm a hopeless romantic. 
"Hopeless" being the operative word.

Monday, June 16, 2014

unforgiven

if there were words which could express 
a single glance of your distress 
what could they say, would they portray
the myriad of feelings led astray
solemn song of the heartbroken
steady drum beats, words unspoken
like the sound of raindrops falling
i hear the ghosts of voices calling
bottled up and then compressed
exploding causing all this mess
my whole world spinning out of control 
pray the earth open and swallow me whole
anything to mend the chasm within my soul...